The same ol'

It's always when exam time is approaching that I blog. Noone is online cause everyone else is busy studying for their own exams...or busy with other things in life. Me sitting in front of the pc, trying for the one millionth to stay off msn (without much success) attempt to study. But as expected, my productivity is never as good as I anticipate.

Thoughts plague my mind like a disease. Playing with the words, what if this, what if that..deciding what to do after exams etc. I'm jealous of those who can concentrate so well and be able to work efficiently but also have time to play. For me on the other hand, the time is wasted, With me doing nothing, gaining nothing. The mind of a procrastinator.

Prior to every exam I say to myself - I must waste less time. What I am currently doing and thinking is not going to help me pass my exam. Leave those useless thoughts till after the exams. But I don't understand. Why am I not convinced? Why can't I have some self control. Frustrated and stressed is my current status.

Frustrated that I'm not getting anywhere with my study. Stressed about the amount of work I need to go through. Angry that I'm wasting precious time whilst everyone else around is hard at work. Why can't I be like them? Why is concentration so hard?

In fact the very question and word on my mind is:

"WHY"?

Ideal home....

How good would it be to be able to live in the city but also enjoy the tranquil surrounding of the Royal Botanic Garden.

A place I can't afford. But at least I can dream about it...